"I Can't Imagine Transitioning ... "

"I Can't Imagine Transitioning... "

Many trans people will tell you that they have heard  that phrase come from the mouths of  family, friends, colleagues.

This a paraphrase of a conversation I've had a couple of times with different people, but for the purposes of this post ...  Yellow is an  educated cisgender woman  and Green is me 

"I Can't Imagine Transitioning... "

"really" says I ... "what's your frame of reference ?" 

" how do you mean? "

" transitioning from what  identity to what identity? "

" having to change everything because of the thought i couldn't cope  with living as a woman any more... "

"  How about we turn the idea inside out ... you are you but everyone tells you  you are a boy, expects you to do boy things, say boy things, wear boy's clothes... How long  could you cope with that ? "

" I don't know "

if this was a cartoon this would be where the light bulb appears above her head and illuminates

" I never thought of it that way, but that  makes so much sense. "


I know for many  readers  this will be preaching to the choir  - a cisgender person is someone whose gender identity is congruent with what is perceived to be their physical sex ( there's a whole rabbit hole to go down with sex determination and intersex conditions)